I could squeeze another productive hour out of each day if the computers over at “Warranty Services” would stop calling me. But they won’t. Almost every day, I get a call telling me my car warranty is about to expire. Which car? They don’t know. When does it expire? They have no idea.
On the infrequent days that the warranty callers don’t call, the credit specialists keep the lines buzzing. “This is your second and final notice!” they say. If only that were true.
Since the calls come in on my business line, the “do not call” registry does me no good. Apparently, legislators haven’t figured out that I am just as annoyed in my office as I am at home. Does the First Amendment permit scam artists to harass you at work but not at home? I’m not aware of any such distinction.
Of course, I opt not to do business with any company that bottom-feeds with robo calls, but I occasionally get these calls from companies that I already do business with. Yes, Advanta, I’m talking about you. Complaining does no good. Here’s the response you get:
Dear Advanta Customer,
As you requested, Advanta is providing you with the following information.
We obtain mailing lists from many sources, including (among others) software registrations, promotions, magazine subscriptions, and credit reporting agencies. Unfortunately, sometimes the information we received can be inaccurate. Thank you for bringing this error to our attention.
If you would provide the phone number and the address at which the invitation was received, we would be happy to remove the information from our files.
You may also mail your request to us at:
Advanta Bank Corp.
PO Box 30715
Salt Lake City, UT 84017-0715
We appreciate the opportunity to serve you and your business needs. If you have any other questions or concerns, please feel free to contact our Customer Service Center. You can visit us online 24 hours a day at www.advanta.com or call us toll free at (800) 705-7255, Monday – Friday 8:00 am to 8:00 pm and Saturday 8:00 am to 5:00 pm Eastern Time.
Mac J.
Account Manager
Advanta
To which I reply:
Dear Mr. J:
You missed the point entirely. There was no error. There was an intrusion, and a very unwelcome one. You intentionally programmed a computer to call a gazillion people in the hopes that a handful of them would find it charming and that the rest would hang up before finding out which company had made the call.
Yours truly,
A Former Customer
Robo calls are a great money saver for the company. Just a few sales will pay for the system, and the computer is tireless. It never gets discouraged no matter how many people hang up on it.
The cost? Well, virtually all of the costs are pushed onto the recipient who stops what he is doing to hear for the umpteenth time, “This is your third and final notice.”
Now, Chuck Schumer of all people wants to do something about it, and I wish him success. But I could save him a lot of time. We don’t need an investigation. People (even shyster businesses) have a right to speak, but they don’t have a right to be heard, or to get you out of bed to be heard, or to make you stop your work to be heard. Chuck could introduce a bill simply outlawing robo calls as a public nuisance. The productive time saved would surely stimulate the economy.
But Chuck won’t do that, because senators also want to be heard, and there is no political mileage in simply cutting to the chase and doing the right thing. First, he has to tell us ad nauseam how concerned he is. After that, he might introduce legislation that makes it illegal for some (but not all) businesses to make robo calls.
You can be sure that somewhere in that bill there will be an exemption that allows political campaigns to make all the robo calls they want.
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